Spare Parts

Usually when I go to my favorite Bak Kut Teh stall, the boss would ask me whether I want the spare parts or not? Meaning, whether I would like to have the liver, intestines etc. I'll always give him a smile and say no.

The recent killing of the tiger and it being cut up into four pieces no doubt brought some emotions and thoughts into me. What's with this people anyway? I was again at the market yesterday when I overheard this table of old fat Ah Bengs were having Bak Kut Teh talking about the tiger. To them, it was nothing. In fact, one of them said, it was survival! The tiger deserved to die. Don't pity the tiger. Because the tiger won't pity you. Tiger Damn Ferocious. Sure Attack You. Attack You Means You Die. That tiger is an animal. Kill such dangerous animal.

I have half a mind to throw my bak kut teh at him. What da fark did the tiger do to him lah? Kan ni neh that fella. Here he is, fat as a pig, eating bak kut teh and commenting about how dangerous a tiger is. Puki maks. I think that puki tiang aedes nyamuk has killed more people than a tiger has in the recent year.

Then, I overheard them talking about eating tiger meat for certain medicinal purposes. Best part, eat Tiger's Dick. Guarantee better than viagra. FARRRRRKKK!!!!. I mean how does that work? I am trying to rationalize it.

Tiger ferocious. Kills. Maims. King of the Jungle. Every farker has watched discovery or national geographic. Every pundek has seen a tiger feed. BUT, HOW MANY TIBAIS WATCHED A TIGER SHAG LAH? SO WHAT'S THE POINT OF EATING HIS DICK? SEKALI TIGER'S SEXUAL PROWESS IS ONLY LIMITED TO 10 SECONDS? PREMATURE EJACULATION LAH! Come on... what's the basis for eating the tiger's dick? Sheesh ...

So .. if I want a longer dick, I eat elephant's trunk is it? If I want a fatter and broader dick, I eat elephant's leg is it? Or, if I want a longer life, I eat turtles? If it really works that way, then people who eat monkey brains .. will think like a monkey? Just what da FARK is wrong with all this people?

There is something called the little blue pill. Go buy it off the counter. You don't even have to kill the pharmacist for it. DAMN!