Boys' Nite Out

Dear Girls,

Question. Why can’t we boys have boys’ nite out or boys’ outing when you bitches girls can have a girls’ nite out? Seriously, what can we do apart from we have done during Stag Nite.

If you don’t understand this male bonding issue, I will try to explain it to you. When we boys go out:

(1) we go to our favorite watering hole and drink anything with 40% alcohol in it. This is to disinfect the germs in our body;

(2) if one bottle consists of 40% alcohol, we need to drink about 3 bottles so that when its totaled up, its more than 100%. Sure can kill the germs;

(3) If unsure how much to drink, we drink until we throw up all the bad things in our body;

(4) Once we are in that stage, we will start to sing the National Anthem and all other anthem that we know to show our patriotism;

(5) Thereafter, we will attempt to see who can throw up the most;

(6) Or we will all line up and see who can piss the furthest;

(7) Or we will all line up and see who can spit the furthest;

(8) Either that, we will go terrorize the nearest t-eleven store;

(9) Or attempt to break into the nearest bank to make our deposits under item (5) (6) and (7) above;

(10) Or we will lie down in the middle of the road and play chicken with any oncoming vehicle.

The above are just a few of things that we do when we go out on a boys night out. There are also more things that we can do. Example, we will go to a dodgy massage parlor or a dodgy ktv joint to get ourselves sexually satisfied by the girls there who would happily fulfill all our sexual fantasies which you girls refuse to fulfill. What fantasies? I’ll leave that to the next blog. So girls, its Friday night. We are going out on an all boys outing tonight.