The girlfriends and wives of my machas are asking what's the deal with stag nite. And why can't we tell them about stag nite.
Hello??!!! That's because you women can't handle it!
Okay. You ladies really want to know? Well, recently, one of our machas got married. So as usual, we organised a stag nite. We all went to this street where all the stag nite joints are located (ahem, of course the name of the place has to be kept a secret. Otherwise, I am advertising for them for free) to check out the prices and the "goods".
While we were standing outside this particular club (let's call it Staggers), this pimp was standing there watching us. He then walked up to us with a swagger and asked us, "boss, you want ah moi?" And our mouths drooled like a pack of hungry wolves and we were speechless. Not a word was said.
At the look of our expression on our faces, the pimp went sigh .... okay, boss, you come in. I show you.
Once inside, it was heavenly. It was a friggin harem in there. All you can see were girls. Just friggin hot sexy chicks everywhere. All the girls were in lingeries. Lacy stuff. Thongs. Garters. Not even a single male in there ... well, except for the bouncer who was a 6' 7" hairy singh. The bartender was just another hot chick and she was in thongs only! Topless!!! Phew! It was hot. Friggin hot in there. All I can say was, its like victoria's secret's models were having a party in there.
Hello??!!! That's because you women can't handle it!
Okay. You ladies really want to know? Well, recently, one of our machas got married. So as usual, we organised a stag nite. We all went to this street where all the stag nite joints are located (ahem, of course the name of the place has to be kept a secret. Otherwise, I am advertising for them for free) to check out the prices and the "goods".
While we were standing outside this particular club (let's call it Staggers), this pimp was standing there watching us. He then walked up to us with a swagger and asked us, "boss, you want ah moi?" And our mouths drooled like a pack of hungry wolves and we were speechless. Not a word was said.
At the look of our expression on our faces, the pimp went sigh .... okay, boss, you come in. I show you.
Once inside, it was heavenly. It was a friggin harem in there. All you can see were girls. Just friggin hot sexy chicks everywhere. All the girls were in lingeries. Lacy stuff. Thongs. Garters. Not even a single male in there ... well, except for the bouncer who was a 6' 7" hairy singh. The bartender was just another hot chick and she was in thongs only! Topless!!! Phew! It was hot. Friggin hot in there. All I can say was, its like victoria's secret's models were having a party in there.
The girls squealed when they saw us hungry wolves walked in. And some of us already have a hard on by just looking around. Its just girls everywhere. We don't know where to start. Next thing we know, it was like a scene from National Geographic where a pack of wolves hunt for their dinner. Except in this case, the wolves just ran after the girls nearest to them, clawing and ripping off the lingeries during the hunt. The wolves didn't even bother about buying the drinks first. Even the bartender was not spared. One wolf jumped over the bar and started shagging the bartender. Forget the foreplays. It was just a grab and shag thingy. It was ... heavenly. It's good to have a harem.
While all the wolves were in their hunt, the stag decided to behave. Of all the nights he chose, he chose his bachelor night to behave. What da fark??!!! And because of him, some of the wolves, could not hunt ... yet. They have to try to convince him that its a Hunter's Moon and after his wedding, he'll be a vegetarian for the rest of his life. While some of the wolves were finished with one prey and starting on another prey, damn stag was still being all good and noble. Tibai. Now all this time, the Hairy Bouncer was eyeing and smiling at the stag. It was kinda worrying.
Finally, we gave up and got some of the girls to hunt the stag instead. The girls screamed and ran after the stag. Damn stag was fast and like a bull, ran out of the club. The girls stopped as they were all naked by then and it would not be a good idea for them to run after the stag in public. Just then, our Hairy Bouncer dashed out in a flash and chased down our stag. It was another National Geographic classic. A scene from the lions hunting down its prey. In this case, the Hairy Bouncer and the stag. The Hairy Bouncer grabbed the stag by the throat and dragged the stag back into the club in handcuffs and chains. Then the girls wanted to have their share of their hunt but damn Hairy Bouncer growled a loud growl and decided to shoot the stag by using his "SPEAR". The girls weren't going to fight the Hairy Bouncer for the stag. Guess that's why the groom's ass was painful the next day and walking kangkang like John Wayne. Definitely not a case of hemorrhoids.
The wolves left the club with tongues hanging out, satisfied and happy. It was a job well done. All the girls were left lying on the floor, exhausted. So was the stag. And everyone lived happily ever after ... until the next stag nite. Haha.
The machahood made a pact that night, that whatever happened that night will remain a secret among the machas only. And if you are asking why I have betrayed that pact by telling it in my blog, well, I understand that some wankers out there has already confessed to their queen alien of the stag nite and since the secret is already out, i might as well try to generate more hits to my blog ... heh heh
*and if you girls actually believe the above are true accounts ... i don't know what to say ..
1 comment:
Ah ... I think you have a secret fantasy to see the stag being "speared" by the Hairy Bouncer. ... The rest of the story was just a smoke screen for your true intentions. Betul, tak?! Hehe
z
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