Friday, April 08, 2005

Banjir!!!

I was happily working today when all of a sudden, I felt the familiar pain in my stomach. Tiu … Must be the damn nasi lemak I ate this morning. Nevermind, gotta finish this work first. Lets see if I can suppress it and ignore the pain. 15 minutes later, farking pain came back. Can even farking hear my stomach churning and growling. Tiu…. I got up and ran to the toilet.

It was a great relief in the toilet. There was so much crap that it piled up like the smoothies or sundaes you get on the ice cream cone. Can even feel the farking sambal burning my ass. This crap came with surround sound kinda sound effect too. Whew … It was …. ecstasy.

After crapping, I needed to get out of the toilet fast. Damn toilet was now like a friggin gas chamber. Don’t want to farking faint in my own fumes. Standing up, I wiped my ass clean. Making sure there’s no more shit clinging to my ass, I pulled the flush lever and started to pull up my pants.

As I was pulling up my pants, I hear the sound of water splashing onto the floor. Strange … how come there’s water splashing onto the floor. While still bending and holding up my pants halfway up, I turned my head slowly to look behind me and saw the most farking horrific scene I have ever seen. Damn farking toilet was not working and it began to friggin overflow. All my shit are coming back out! Aieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! And I thought a tsunami was scary. Fark! Imagine a wave of shit coming after you. And my pants is only halfway up. Fark! Fark! Fark!

I reached out and turned the door handle and hopped out of the farking toilet. Kan ni na. Thank God my undies are alredi up. Damn shit was still overflowing and I can see my shit everywhere. Damn … There was damn a lot of shit. Feels as if I haven’t shit for weeks.

Once the water stopped overflowing, I viewed the aftermath. Phew! And I thought Aceh looked bad. I closed the toilet door and locked it before I stuck a piece of paper on the door that says, “AWAS! Banjir Berak!” (Warning. Shit Flooding). After that I went to tell my Admin Manager that the toilet’s spoilt and to call the plumber. And guess what? The 2 Heroes that came and solved the problem and cleared all that shit were … Ah Bengs …. Maybe I should reconsider ridiculing the Ah Bengs from now onwards … or maybe, just certain category of Ah Bengs only.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am sure the Ah Bengs were cursing the shit out of you with very flowery language ...

Anonymous said...

whew!...so glad we didn't have nasi lemak in bali..... :P